I had certain ancestors, I was born in a certain place in a certain year, I went to certain schools and college*, I passed or failed to pass or (despite very nearly first-rate intelligence) only just scraped through certain exams, as a result I worked in certain jobs. What does that kind of information say about me, the true inner me-ness of me? A little, yes, but not very much, because it approximates to the experience of tens of thousands of others (at least?) And, ungrateful though that appears, now that I feel grown up at last -- high time at 68! -- it is in many ways despite not because of my family, education and 'profession'.
Not at all by the way:
I don't acknowledge any inferiority in intelligence or talent to others who got into Cambridge at 17, (although I'm sure many of them have worked harder.)
I taught at two highly regarded schools, I have had three books published, and uncountable reviews. Most importantly, two remarkable women have fallen in love with me.
What I have not achieved is fame or wealth or public honours -- well, the first I would probably have detested.
I was an excellent husband and father* in unspeakably difficult circumstances; that is something I am most proud of. (And need to be.) Though not formally married, I have been a good husband to Judith, and have never (well, never at all seriously) thought about another woman - loyalty!
(*It is now more than 25 years and I have had not one word from my stepchildren, whom I loved, as far as I can tell, just as if they were of my own blood, and made so many sacrifices for. If it were to be only one word, 'thanks' would be appropriate.)
I was brought up to be a 'rabid' teetotaler. If I had to be brought up to be (what is regarded as) a crank, I would much rather it had been as a nudist and vegetarian.
*I have written about 'Sharth School'; I'd like some time to add -- it too would be sarcastic -- 'St. Saviour's College, Oxbridge.'
Wednesday 29 September 2010
Brief 'philosophy'
Is there a God?
Do I have a soul?/Is there life after death?
I grew up among people who were sure that the answers were yes! and yes! to those two questions. Those who have not thought about them, whatever their answers, have relinquished any claim to be intelligent, or never had any to begin with.
My own answers now are 'yes' to both, though cautiously. I am a Christian, (yes, I am, though maybe nowadays only just about), though often sceptical, and probably unorthodox; I admire Taoism because it pays attention to the physical body in a way Christianity does not.
I incline to believe in reincarnation.
I incline to believe that the Universe is itself a living creature (whether that is the same as saying the Universe itself is God, I just don't know.)
Everything seems to be knitting together.
---
Two thoughts:
Apart from the alleged 'primordial soup' in which 'by chance' life 'arose' there is no case in which life has ever arisen except from other life - isn't this an argument for God?
I cannot write even a note to the milkman without putting into it something of myself - my handwriting, my characteristic way of expressing myself; I cannot create anything wholly separate from myself. So it is untenable to say even that God can - everything must share in His Is-ness. Foolish to ask, do dogs have a soul? or birds? or slugs? All participate in the life of God, everything is partly Spirit - or rather principally.
From 'internal evidence', looking at the night sky, I deduce a love of beauty and an amazing even as-it-were insane extravagence.
But can we really know God?
--
Two reflections on the religious/social training, such as it was, that I had as a child:
God made everything, but parts of my body were 'naughty'. this 'naughtiness' was attended with horror, fear, even hatred which war, for instance, did not inspire.
I like everybody else had a body and a soul. The soul was entirely a different thing from the body. That 'entirely' is heresy.
I firmly believe that this alleged separation was the root of very much ill-health.
--
And in order to save your soul mustn't you find it first? (Know thyself.) NOT make cliche-ridden assumptions about your own character.
As a teenager I inveighed against 'respectability', obsessive concern with what the family or the neighbours would think about you -- and surely I was right, because all this is a disguise for what you think of yourself, preening yourself on your own good character. And have I ever myself been free of it?
Do I have a soul?/Is there life after death?
I grew up among people who were sure that the answers were yes! and yes! to those two questions. Those who have not thought about them, whatever their answers, have relinquished any claim to be intelligent, or never had any to begin with.
My own answers now are 'yes' to both, though cautiously. I am a Christian, (yes, I am, though maybe nowadays only just about), though often sceptical, and probably unorthodox; I admire Taoism because it pays attention to the physical body in a way Christianity does not.
I incline to believe in reincarnation.
I incline to believe that the Universe is itself a living creature (whether that is the same as saying the Universe itself is God, I just don't know.)
Everything seems to be knitting together.
---
Two thoughts:
Apart from the alleged 'primordial soup' in which 'by chance' life 'arose' there is no case in which life has ever arisen except from other life - isn't this an argument for God?
I cannot write even a note to the milkman without putting into it something of myself - my handwriting, my characteristic way of expressing myself; I cannot create anything wholly separate from myself. So it is untenable to say even that God can - everything must share in His Is-ness. Foolish to ask, do dogs have a soul? or birds? or slugs? All participate in the life of God, everything is partly Spirit - or rather principally.
From 'internal evidence', looking at the night sky, I deduce a love of beauty and an amazing even as-it-were insane extravagence.
But can we really know God?
--
Two reflections on the religious/social training, such as it was, that I had as a child:
God made everything, but parts of my body were 'naughty'. this 'naughtiness' was attended with horror, fear, even hatred which war, for instance, did not inspire.
I like everybody else had a body and a soul. The soul was entirely a different thing from the body. That 'entirely' is heresy.
I firmly believe that this alleged separation was the root of very much ill-health.
--
And in order to save your soul mustn't you find it first? (Know thyself.) NOT make cliche-ridden assumptions about your own character.
As a teenager I inveighed against 'respectability', obsessive concern with what the family or the neighbours would think about you -- and surely I was right, because all this is a disguise for what you think of yourself, preening yourself on your own good character. And have I ever myself been free of it?
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